chocolateass

Broke like shattered glass

2011-10-23T14:16:00.002+08:00

When there is a huge difference between RM2.50 and RM1,
When loose change becomes my treasure,
When the buns are half price at 6 o'clock,
When lunch I conveniently forsake,
When walking to work is the only option left,
When "broke like shattered glass" actually makes sense.

But when there is sun or rain,
But when the homeless is grinning,
But when I cannot explain the joy within, regardless,
I know that God is still watching over me. :)

My Guardian Angel

2011-04-12T23:13:00.002+08:00

I'm gifted with blasting ability to imagine.

I also have irrational sense of fear.

Combined together, that's just CRAP.

So i was brushing my teeth last night, and i suddenly imagined if there was a ghost behind me.

I've always imagined it scarier, like some girl seeking for revenge over i don't know what. Here's a thought though, why are all vengeful unrest spirits female huh? Sexism.

I always turn around to check if there's anything behind me every time i feel the creeps. But then right after that i imagined it's in front of me, waiting for me to turn back front.

You see, my brain is so good it scares the shit out of me.

So last night i decided to think otherwise, i imagined having a guardian angel. This guardian angel protects me :D

It worked!

After brushing my teeth, i lay down and thought more about the guardian angel. They have got to be by your side all the time, right?

Creepy.

If i have one, i'm sure others do too. Look over your shoulders, quick because they're damn good in disappearing.

I think mine looks like this,

Then i realized, if they're always beside us.. that means ... omg. NOOOO.

They know our FB password. But i think that's the least i've got to be worry about. Haha.

Are they friends with other guardian angels?

There must be a thousand 'types' of them.

It's actually nice to be watched over when i'm asleep.

But that also means ...

*awkward*

Things I say in moment of disarray

2011-03-28T00:41:00.000+08:00

Sitting here in my panties, knees folded near my bare chest. Listening to the song everything changes from Staind, squinting my eyes typing this just because I feel like it. I should grab my glasses.

Better. Now I’m leaned back, pulled on a shirt and just might start to stare blankly at the screen.

“If you just walked away, what could I really say? Would it matter anyway, would it change how you feel?”

How on earth did I manage to remember this long ago song that I use to love out of the blue? Right now I wish I have my guitar with me.

Or rather, anybody's guitar will do.

Been awhile since there’s any progress in my sketch book, right now there’s a circle, cone, square, rectangle.

*long sigh*

21 years old.

I'll KILL you I swear

2011-02-28T16:01:00.000+08:00

Living with people can sometimes be a hell, especially among girls (i don't know why must be the hormones and emotions or stuff like that).

It's hard to tell them to clean the toilet on schedule or keep the kitchen dry for example.

Some leave notes, but marker written notes that go "Please keep toilet clean" don't work.

Unless you do it this way.

Threaten them. It always work, plus it's funny too.

Or you can approach them the super sweet way. Like introducing a cute character.

This is Pinko. We use it to scrub the kitchen sink. Yes we do, yes we do. Aawwh say it with me, yes we do, yes we do.

We keep it dry, and we keep it clean. Yes we do, yes we do.

We can even add a lame humor. Yes we can, yes we can.

When it's all pretty, we put big ass tapes behind them. Yes we put big ass tapes behind them, yes we put big ass tapes behind them.

Then we put them on the wall. On the wall, on the wall. It must be where the problem is. In the kitchen, in the kitchen.

Pretty like mad. Who can say no? Nobody can, nobody can.

Another one. This is for the toilet. We can do this,

or draw a cute pink shit.

And if we want everybody to take turns washing the toilet, put a cute schedule that tells them when to do it. Not "please take turns to clean toilet or I'll kill you".

Look. Yu Yun has to do on the 5th of every month, Tina has to do it on the 15th of every month, and I have to do it on the 25th of every month.

Instead of just that, add in what they should do too. Do remember that in order to attract girls, every thing must look cute. So add that ribbon and eye lashes to the otherwise dull sponge.

Taa daa!! Now I can't wait till it's 25th of March.

I could earn all I want, spend all I want, fuc...

2011-02-26T16:14:00.003+08:00

I can enjoy the sea breeze, the pretty high heels and the sweet chocolate bar.

I went to kindergarten, primary, secondary, college and I'm now in a university.

I could try my best to work hard, earn money and buy a collection of LV bags. I could lose weight, go for plastic surgery and marry a rich man. I could start a business, expand it all around the globe and hopefully end up on Forbes front page.

I could. You could. We could.

But then one day I will die, then where will I go?

I could earn all I could in this life, spend all I want, fuck all I want, drink all I want. And at the end, am I only going to be trap in a box 6 feet under?

I recognize my role is different from other creation, such as cats lazing on a grave or an old dog searching for a highway.

And I know, there's more to the word "Life".

You know it too, you just don't want to acknowledge it.

Valentine's Day 2011

2011-02-14T20:26:00.002+08:00

Today is Valentine's Day.

Everybody is giving everybody something.

I am saved from humiliation!

Must show off to friends without anything. Muahaha.

fml :(

But anyway

Thanks for reading!

*muacks love hugs kiss kiss bang*

The reason i miss church, again.

2011-01-23T16:14:00.001+08:00

The van to church is at 6.45 am every Sunday. I went to sleep at 12.30 am that night.

I HAD TO PEE

But finally.

It was already 11am. :(

Vivian Luv

2011-01-05T14:15:00.000+08:00

Spent lots of time with Viv Luv this holiday.

First was trip at Ipoh. Her dad is nice, and her mum doesn't like fat people.

Attending Ciara's 1st bd celebration at Ipoh shop lot club :)

Reached there early, so camwhore first.

Complimentary drinks!

Sucks like CRAAAAZZZYY.

Ciara! Boy was she happy to see ME!

Went home and camwhore again! Got tons actually.

Aren't i pretty?

Vivian and family's pet. No idea what is that squeeky thing.

Going for breakfast with her family at FO SHAN!

Which reminded me of a funny story. I thought Fo Shan was a kind of cuisine at first. Was on the phone with Janssen,

Me: I'm going to eat Fo Shan!

Janssen: What is that?

Me: I don't know! :D

Manicure!

Note: The 5 following pictures have been stolen from FB.

Ciara's pork rib! Her mum is an awesome cook.

Ciara is happy cutting the bd cake she baked.

Which was Super Awesome!

Playing games. With LIQUOR!

Round faces! :D

Came back ans camwhore again. *noms on vivian*

Then it was time to go back Subang without Vivian :(

But she returned near christmas! And we raped La Senza's lingerie store!

Nice not my body :P

Super push up with Viv. Hah.

Few days later, we met up again. This time she came over and played games with my nephews.

Then went to my room for makeover!

Slightly dark. But both so pretty must upload.

Pretty mar?

At some Taiwan shop. Vivian looks tensed cause we lied to the seat-stingy staff who didn't let us sit at a bigger sofa. He even came and tested us. Anus.

Vivian Love :)

I miss you already. Ain't life sweet sometimes?

Roast me

2010-12-01T19:25:00.000+08:00

Oh just roast me.

I'm good as dead. Might as well take full advantage of my situation, roast me and eat me up.

I've got cleavage and you don't.

2010-11-26T23:46:00.001+08:00

Finals are finally over. Thank Jesus.

I'm stuck here for an extra week, because i need to attend Japanese intensive course for my JLPT Level 3 next Sunday, in Confucius High School. It's in KL i presume?

You know what really turns me off? People who don't think twice before they let something slip from their mouth. These kind of people, never regards another person's feelings. They build their confidence from hurting others, and it's even more disgusting when they try to squeeze a lil' deal out of it.

Like saying, "Omg you're so fat already, here let me eat your share".

This is epic. I was happily munching on my bag of Twisties ~~cause i don't wanna diet cause i'm too lazy and have no confidence that diet will make me thinner compared to liposuction~~ cause I'm cool with my body shit you.

And this nincompoop said.

"Wow you're eating again, you're going to make me so fat".

BLARDY annoyed but with that cursed curiosity, i go

And the ever so awesome reply came,

"Being around with somebody who eats too much or overweight will make you fat. And you're so chubby. Oh but you're still so cute don't worry.".

Seriously. Who bitches like that?

What i really wanna say is. "You know... you should go die."

But then again.

Cause you know why?

I've got cleavage and you don't.

I'm not even going to say i've got a deeper cleavage than you.

I only get drunk once in awhile

2010-11-08T02:19:00.001+08:00

Had a blast yesterday :D

Went to the night service at 7pm with Gillian. Me with killer high heels, long jeans and a normal F21 top. Her with a short skirt and decent blouse.

Took pictures outside the church waiting for Kevin to pick us up. Still looking quite decent, with a bible in my bag.

Hours later.

What. Oh don't judge me. It was a candid shot :)

Headed off to clubbing cause it's Stewart's birthday!

Getting caked.

Before we were intoxicated with whiskey, tequila pops and beers.

And after.

Gillian blurred out cause she's too slow :P

Super cute. I like. Eeee :P

Me, Gillian and Vivian

The night was fun :) Stress relieving, although my stress haven't quite build up yet. Exam is in 2 days time! Pray for me cause i'm such a sweet girl and deserve good results.

And i only get drunk once in awhile.

Really.

How to fry veg using a rice cooker

2010-11-01T14:50:00.001+08:00

Totally getting so good at cooking!

I fried this plate of vegetable using rice cooker! I think i rock. Cause it turned out yummy and pretty ~~and i don't care what you say or think~~ and kindda satisfying :) Really.

See, i'm even sharing my ridiculous recipe ~~cause i have no idea what to blog about~~ cause it's really nice.

Ingredients:

(Serving for 1)
1 tablespoon of anchovies
1 or 2 shallot
5 cloves of garlic
10 sticks of four angled beans
3 quarter tea spoon of salt
1 tablespoon of oil

This is how four angled beans look like. It can be stored up to 1 week without refrigerator. Then it'll start turning black and dry. The BEST PART about this vegetable is it doesn't screws with your entire food cabinet by releasing smelly wet liquid to tell you it's rotten. It just turns dry and skinny.

Go ahead. Try it.

Instructions:

1. Heat rice cooker. You may touch the pot to check if it's really hot. If your fingers feel a sting of burning pain, then i guess it's hot enough.

Note:
#1 Some people may find it difficult to keep the rice pot "down" whereby it keeps popping up because the weight in it is insufficient. Cover the lid and put a bowl on it to keep it down. Okay, i guess you can use your right Nike shoe. Or Adidas cause it's cheaper.

2. When you're sure that it's hot enough, pour oil. And wait.

3. When you're sure that the oil has been heated up, throw anchovies, chopped garlic and shallots inside. Then wait again.

4. If your rice pot is the economical kind, you know, the cheap kind, you can thus spend 6-7 minutes to wait for it to heat up again. Go on, stir fry it. Till you smell a nice aroma.

Note:
#1 Sometimes your garlic, oil and shallots aren't enough to keep the pot "down". Please use a cloth that is thick enough to hold one side down while you're stirring it. Really.
#2 Don't be sticking your face close to the pot to get a better scent. Because it hurts when the oil unexpectedly 'piaks' at your face. If you just can't smell it, it is not cooked enough. If it turned black, you need to check on your sinus.

5. Throw the sliced vegetable inside. It is advised by ME to slice it thinner because it is a rice pot dammit. So it's not going to cook that soon.

Tips:
#1 If you're already at this step and your veg has already been thickly chopped, paint your nails while you're waiting.
#2 Or maybe you shouldn't bother anymore. A bowl of instant noodle would be fine at this point. Cause if you do attempt to fry something that thick with a rice pot, by the time it's thoroughly cooked, the outer part has turned black.

6. Cover the lid for about 3 minutes.

7. Open again and stir fry it :)

Note:
#1 Please refrain from using something sharp and metallic like forks or eye brow tweezers to fry your veg in the rice pot. This is because you'll damage the surface and expose yourself to a possibility of electrocution.

No, i am not speaking from experience.

8. Add salt to season as desired. Walaa!

Simple eh? It doesn't even require step no.9.

Check out the scores i gave myself!

Presentation: 89%

Taste: 93%

Effort: 102%

Skills: 70%

Beat that.

Tom Yam and Big Apple

2010-10-19T18:58:00.001+08:00

Am feeling so sick these days :/

Anyway!

I had steamboat with some friends last week, Tom Yam, too much food, can die.

And for dessert ;)

Big frigging Apple love from KK!

It's so precious because there's no donuts shop in Labuan, and because after the 3 and a half hour of ferry ride it's still in such good condition!

Thanks Wai Loon!

Stronger Now

2010-10-13T01:23:00.003+08:00

I'm trying to pick up the pieces in my life now :) I make an attempt to jog or do yoga on a daily basis, try my best not to miss morning classes, do my Japanese homework, and pray before i sleep every night.

Actually i just got use to sleeping alone with my lights turned off. It's actually not that scary after all. Took me 20 years to realized this.

What has been bothering me is just the way my love life has been.

Sometimes, i just couldn't find the right words to say to that special someone anymore.

And it is left unsent, unsaid, unwritten, incomplete.

In life, i've met sisters that i will always cherish.

The ever faithful and trustworthy a ma.

The sweetest ah be.

Vivian my love.

The imperfect happiness.

One and only momoput.

Aun who cares most.

Then comes the time, where someone decides to move on from me completely.

Maybe too much pain has occurred, too little understanding came around. Where those three words have been said too many times, but it is still not enough.

Along the way, i achieved something worth being proud of.

A whooping 3.93 GPA.

2 Deacon Award certificates.

I learn too, that there are plenty of things worth noticing around me.

Like the rain drops on a bus window.

The joy on his dirty face.

The pink roses that hardly comes by.

The staircase of KMJ - Blok D.

Zac!

The view of the sun setting from a beach cafe.

The sexiness this beautiful Siew Mai portrays.

And as i go on each day, i fight for the Faith in my heart to stay alive.

As if heartaches weren't enough, I went through physically painful times too.

This was painful as hell.

I cried. Those amateur nurses were idiots. And the old ones just got annoyed that i'm crying. They yanked it out and put it in again and again because they couldn't find my vein.

Glad that's over.

I threw a real surprise birthday party for the first time.

Meet a group of hardworking friends that i never thought i could have fun with.

I wasn't even drunk yet.

And of course, i got drunk a couple of times this year.

(Okay, tons of time)

Learn a new language.

Looi Irene Kawai

From a stern but loving 60 years old Japanese.

I spent 1 year with a group of people that was randomly thrown into a same apartment together.

And like many people, i did mistakes in life too.

Like perm my hair.

Eating like a pig with an ugly hair.

Piercing 2 holes at the same time on my belly button. Now closed btw.

Apart from the sisters above, I meet some really sweet and friendly guy friends in life too :)

Afiq.

Szeto.

Mike :)

I also met someone unforgettable and deeply disturbed.

But i like him just so much because he's crazy.

The one person that i'll always be filled with concern, gratitude and love for.

The one who introduced me to plenty of joy in year 2007/2008.

I climbed Mt. KK. too. Where i experienced that the voice in your head is way more powerful than what your body says.

We make goals, and forget them so easily. Don't you think? Like my 45 kg goal.

It's been 9 months, i'm still at 50kg.

Wha ... ? I keep forgetting 45kg.

Then there's people that has high tolerance towards Irene.

Sook Ping

Snoopy Lover

And people who i'll never cease to pray for each night.

Momo

Le Le

Zher Zher

Yung Yung

In life, we can probably lie to our parents and go to Paris, just once.

Gotcha.

Well.

Sometimes, you wake up from a dream.

But you know what?

Life will always be good.

Just be strong and take a big first step out when you're ready if something closes you in.

This was what i learned in the past few weeks.

❤

Stronger now

Love the way you lie

2010-09-01T02:17:00.000+08:00

It's an emo night.

I have a quiz and a mid term tomorrow, and the next day i have to submit my assignment which i have not even started.

Everybody is studying at the moment, those that are done are blissfully sleeping.

Aah, give me time.

At least give me laundry time.

It's such a warm night. After being on the phone with him, i cried a lil. Not too much, but just a little. Only a little strength was needed to shake the tears and feeling away. I wished i hadn't wake up, when i took the sweaty one hour nap at 10pm. At least i'll be sleeping now, and won't be as frustrated. The fan is right above me, and i'm wondering if it's my dreams that are making me sweat. Was it him leaving me again? Or simply his ghostly images running through my subconscious mind.

The song that accompanied me through the pain two months back was playing on repeat earlier.

'... that's alright, because i love the way you lie.'

Funny. Nobody lied to me.

Nothing nice happens in Labuan

2010-08-03T23:43:00.000+08:00

Branded cosmetics makeovers don't happen in Labuan.

Starbucks went bankrupt in Labuan.

There's not a single fucking reputable donut store in Labuan. OH COME ON.

After 9 there's almost nowhere else to go in Labuan.

The only cinema in Labuan is a shoplot cinema. That's just fucked up.

There is only one shopping mall in Labuan and it is a mess.

The Parkson in Labuan sells brands that i've never heard of.

Giant in Labuan sells food that are expired.

Even rainbows hardly occur in Labuan.

Nice choice, chocoass.

Manikar Hostel

2010-07-16T15:27:00.000+08:00

I'm currently staying in Manikar beach and spa resort, Labuan. Yes i've return but i'm staying there for this entire month, till the campus finish their renovation.

Oh don't worry, the uni is paying for it. Downside about this is i have to share a room with 3 other girls.

I'm not much of a complainer or a troublesome roommate, but i'd appreciate having certain degree of privacy?

Dammit.

I want loads of privacy.

I want a single room. A permanent single room when i come back to this forsaken uni.

I'm done with sharing. And i'll come up with any excuse in the world to get a single room. Even if i have to bribe the damn person in charge. Is 500 bucks too much?

Went swimming this morning. Weeeee. But in t shirt and shorts over my bikini. Booooo. Rules suck. Judgmental people sucks. People with too much of their own opinion and speaks them aloud suck. Those who follow them suck even more.

The Reopening. Haha.

2010-07-14T15:03:00.000+08:00

The reason i restricted my blog to only a few readers was because.

The reason some was not invited was because i didn't know which e-mail addresses you guys were using to log in to blogspot. Sorry about that. =/

Also, i have not been blogging since May cause i hardly go online back in Subang.

Oh well.

It's not restricted anymore now. Bleh.

Msn horny girl

2010-05-05T03:48:00.002+08:00

OKAY OKAY. SO EVERYBODY HAS GOT SOMEBODY THAT LOOOVES THEM NOW.

Why is this happening to me! Why don't i have a bobo like huiyee, darling like a ma, lau gong like a suang, and those lousy names that i'm very jealous of??

Can't seem to be alone too long. I remember making this silly promise to myself, that i'll never be without a boyfriend. And all those guys just come and go, making me feel afraid every time a new love comes by. It's not that i don't wanna commit, it's just that they can't commit. It's not that i don't wanna trust, it's just that they lie too much. It's not that i'm being stubborn and not choosing one, it's just that i'm too scared to give him all.

Besides, clubbing is way too fun fyi. Clubbing with restraining command, aah, no thanks.

Anyway, you guys know about those spam contacts that adds you in msn. And when you approve them because you thought they're your friend, the first thing they say is: "Hi, sex talk?"

Hahaha. I entertained this lady. Her name is Karen.

This is how she started. Pink is her!

- says (11:54 PM):
mind talk erotic v me?
says (11:54 PM):
you're a guy?
- says (11:54 PM):
i`m not.
says (11:55 PM):
you're a lesbian?
- says (11:55 PM):
not also

don worry

just wan erotic talk

says (11:55 PM):
you're a lesbian?
says (11:55 PM):
then talk what erotic wor
haha
- says (11:56 PM):

u got watch porn movie?

- says (11:57 PM):

- just sent you a nudge.

says (11:58 PM):
sometimes la

What. I watched because i'm curious.

Hah.

Anyway.

I started suspecting that she's a guy, i mean, for all you know 'she' could be a guy. And so i asked my other friend to find out about her, he did. Previously she told me that she was 19 years old. Fucking horny 19 year old bitch.

I very mean meh. For all you know she could be blogging about me being a slut what.

(F) Mike says (12:17 AM):
karen tey 27 years old

Can find her on friendster. But not on facebook. Who uses friendster man.

So i disturbed her.

says (12:17 AM):
karen tey 27 years old
hor
you lie to me
- says (12:17 AM):
i`m not karen tey ok
- says (12:18 AM):
i dunno where u found out a karen tey

After that, she says she'll prove to me that she's a girl by opening her webcam. But i'm afraid if she'll show me some really disgusting disease for some weird reason. Then i kept saying no, and when i finally accepted, i covered the screen with my hands. And peek little by little. No face at all.

So.

says (12:22 AM):
you don't show face then you show what
- says (12:22 AM):
part to prove i`m gal
breast.
says (12:22 AM):
cheh
i don't want to see breast la
- says (12:23 AM):
then?
says (12:24 AM):
your face la!

But she shy.

So in the end i accepted her offer to see her breast. Then she wants to see me, i let her cause i'm not shy. Or maybe i'm just dumb. But i did took the courtesy to print screen it for your viewing pleasure.

But i did took the courtesy to spray paint her email address la.

Nice body. I like. But then she keeps pestering me to take off my shirt.

And after awhile, i got bored. So..

I blocked her.

Old man

2010-05-02T03:22:00.003+08:00

Old man. Sketched it from the internet few days ago. I was ultra grumpy. How is it? Still amateur. But i'll improve! =D

Surrender, surrender, the touch of you.

2010-05-01T03:43:00.000+08:00

Dear diary,

Yeah, a pretty sad note to start with. Dear diary. Why doesn't it ever continue with i had ice cream today and it was completely non fat?

I watched Dear John today. I read the book before, it was so much more sadder than the movie. Don't like the girl, she's one of the actress in Jeniffer's body.

You know the feeling, of telling yourself that it's impossible to fall in love with someone, and then that person does simply so many things, to make you feel like that girl in Form 2 who found someone she really likes and is actually considering him as a husband already?

Okay, maybe nobody does that but me.

As the days go by, the apple of my eye, i'll always wait for you.
And as the new day dawns, the darkness moves away, and i will wait for you.
Remember, remember, the face of you.
Surrender, surrender, the touch of you.

Who am i waiting for?

It's tiring.

I go through my days, wondering if i have met that someone. And if these people are lying to me. I feel lonely. Aah, what an emo post.

I wanna sketch.

So many things i want to say here. Too many. Maybe.

I wanna play the guitar. Strum the frustration away.

Don't tell me to change. I refuse. I love how things are with my life. I love my flirts. They make me happy.

What i don't like is, what people say about me.

Just because you don't have the guts to live my life, then don't be jeopardizing my image for your own pathetic sake.

Owh, who am i kidding. These people who talk about me don't read my blog.

Chocolate Love Making

2010-04-22T17:06:00.001+08:00

I had a nice buffet dinner the other night at a nice hotel! Super long ago, but now only got time to upload pictures. This dinner was sponsored by our Japanese lecturer, Mr. Fujishima Norihiko. I think he's so nice after he took us for study trip, and now buffet dinner. Did you guys know? That Japanese people are very generous, he tipped every server in our room 20 bucks! Even the guy that helped us switch on the karaoke machine. Sibeh generous.

Pictures =)

Theme of the night. Got exercises to do wan. Cause he's damn Japanese, have to teach us something before letting us eat.

One of the super cute decorations. According to class rep, this hotel doesn't have much of Japanese theme. And sensei had to make special request to decorate the entire room in Japanese concept.

Nice right the table settings? These are appetizers and dessert section. I have my eyes locked on the ice creams! Spot me!

Sushi. Nuff said. They just keep refilling it. And i kept eating only the salmon. Haha.

I had 5 pieces of this. Was so good i could just tapao. But that'll be embarrassing.

ICE CREAM! I dig green tea ice cream. So good man.

Just mad.

Tempura prawns. Damn yucky. Labuan people stinks at making tempura. The only tempura they are good at is tempura banana - goreng pisang.

NYAM!

My sensei. Cute not? 58 years old this year. So cute, yet so fierce and mean. If only you did his homework before. Can die i tell you. Just lie down and die.

lllllllllllllllllllllllll Exam mode lllllllllllllllllllllllll

Believe all local Uni are facing it. One more paper tomorrow, nothing next week, 2 paper the week after. Stupid Uni. Don't know how to arrange wan. I'm having 6 papers this week itself.

Yesterday i completely burned my Multimedia paper. Stupid minor paper. IF i were to get a high pointer this semester as well, i'll get a scholarship of rm2,500.00 next semester.

You know how many clothes i can buy with that amount arh?

Then came Multimedia.

Tralalalala ~ and took my dream away.

Maybe my intention should be to give it to charity or church. Haha.

VIVIAN CHAN

THE MMS NEVER GET THROUGH ONLY OKAY.

Favourite so far. SO GOOD i can just MELT 1 thousand freaking times.

Purposely saved the wrapping so i know which one to buy next time. Muahahaha.

Easter bunny chocolate from Frey. Ear break already =(
I had the white bunny with my roommate already. So good.

I know Easter pass damn long already la. But since Alex's friend posted to him from Aussie late, postman also late, he got it late, gave me half late, i ma got it late loh.

Chocolates help me do everything. Make me happy, make me high, give me strength to study, act as a motivation (1 bite every 10 pages - it works okay), keeps me awake. If only it helps me lose weight.

Chocolate Love Making

start slow

let it build up

and

*climax*

damn pleased

finishing up, can't just leave it hanging.

final hard licking

Aahh. And then we start all over again.

It's stuck

2010-04-16T02:49:00.000+08:00

Something happened, something really bad,

something i thought i'd forget, but i didn't.

It stucked on.

It just did.

And i couldn't sleep at night,

Because it feels painful,

On the left side of my cheek,

I know it's my head doing the talking,

It isn't there anymore,

It's already long gone.

But why?

Every time i'm reminded of it, it stings,

It really does.

The problem still remains.

I'm dead.

It's haunting me.

I can't forgive you, i'm not sorry

I'm not.

I didn't deserve it

No.

You don't stab someone, and say sorry.

I'm not Jesus

Should i be?

I could try

That's the best i could do

I could try

Deacon Award Night!

2010-04-08T00:33:00.001+08:00

Remember i bought the white dress? =) It was for my deacon award night! It was themed nostalgic night, along with the farewell dinner for the 3rd year seniors. Sobs, if i was leaving Labuan i'd cry.

Seriously. Where else would anyone experience bathing at the big water tank in the open air with a towel? Running down to fetch a pail of water when your tummy aches? Squatting around scrubbing clothes.?Being bullied when it comes to lining up to take water? Washing our hair at the water tank and getting our shirt wet? And all the time being an undergrad for International Marketing.

These people that we meet over here, coming from Labuan, Sabah and Sarawak. There's not going to be a big chance in meeting them when i grad and go back to heavenly Subang. Feel sad that few of my seniors will be leaving soon. Who's gonna take care of me and make me milo when i'm super hungry? :(

Anyway! Pictures!

With the two MC of the night. Both 1st year, geng right.

With Wai Yen. =) Super noisy but fun friend.

She wanted to pull my zip down!

With a bunch of seniors =)

Best performer of the night! Denius!

Taking a slighter kinky shot =P

The pretty high ceiling with drapes =)

After my performance.

The end of the night. Super high! Don't know why.

5th bowl of mutton. So good so good so damn good.

My pointer for previous semester was 3.92. I'm so proud of it, praise God =)

This semester will definitely be harder, cause of my minors and my lousy carry marks. But i really hope i'll be qualified to attend the next year's deacon award night.

Oh please please let me God. Oh please please please please!

Shopping for a dress

2010-04-01T04:02:00.001+08:00

Went shopping today for my Saturday dinner's dress. =) Mum super mean, tell me to wear jeans and t shirt for the dinner. Said she'll bank in rm30. FML.

They'll never understand peer pressure. I thought they went through it themselves? Anyway. I find the theme for the dinner weird. Nostalgic night, dress up in your best 60s or 70s outfit.

Huh?

That's not really nostalgic to me leh. I wasn't born yet wor.

So i was thinking maybe i should wear high waist pants. OR flare skirt. Leggings, what not.

THEN

I found out that my seniors are all gonna go in dresses and fuck the theme.

LUCKY ME.

My roommate gave me the idea of a green jacket and pants, with lots of bling bling. And i was wondering about an airfro. YAO YENG RIGHT!

Oh. Right. Mum gave the idea of a scarf too. Sure it'll go well with a shirt and a jeans.

So here's my shopping trip photos!

Winkee went with me, and was my photographer!

Photo quality not that good. Old Sony Ericsson normal phone that's why. But better than nothing what.

First stop. Sky Park. Pricey like shit, most of em bon bon, that pink lollipop brand. The black ones has 20% off. The blue is new arrival.

First try. Don't like the dress. But i like the mirror's reflection. ;)

Second try. We actually thought this was not bad!

Third attempt. New arrival. Too long, cause legs too short. Model wannabe attempt. =P

Then we took a stroll to Parkson. Nothing nice there, except for bras. Did i mention Triumph is having a sale till 4th of April? =)

If only i was thinner...

Stumbled into this shop. It imports clothes, bags and boots from Korea and Japan. Not cheap too.

4th. Shinny, tight, slutty. NICE. rm130 though. After much bargaining only manage to get rm120. Don't want adie.

Just look at the curves! ^^ Lucky not straight down YET.

No. FIVE. Super blurry but can still see the dress right? Main point here!

Same one.

no. 6. Same style, gold in colour. Looks tall right?

Can't afford it. rm190. :( This has got to be my fav pic so far.

Frustrated at this point. I liked some, but not very. But i have to get one cause i've got no more time. When irene is frustrated, irene eats.

Stopped for bubble tea and Chai Kuih. Not bad.

*nyam nyam nyam* cannot stop eating.

Went back to Sky Park. (Yes, Labuan is limited.)

Love this material. This is dress number 8. Super low cut though. Maybe TOO low.

Pardon my awkward face. No.9. I actually like this one, 20% off rm80.

THIS! I SUPER LIKE! I found it buried away! no. 10!

See. Super excited. Not much curves though. Hmm.

no.11! Super like too! So going to wear this!

See! Can zip up and look retro! The material not bad one okay.

~And got pocket too!~

Winkee and I. =) end of shopping.

I bought all of the dresses!

ngek ngek.

No la. Bought the last two nia. Satisfied. Although i only needed one.

Oh please don't tell mummy.

One day

2010-03-25T20:50:00.002+08:00

~And i don't care what they say, i wanna be with you, i wanna be with you, i wanna be with you~

Sometimes i feel ultra lonely, cause i still don't know who's that one.

That one that will love me the way i want him to, and that one that i'll love back like he wants me to.

We'll have reasons to talk all night even when it's 5 years later,

We'll still find time for each other even when we're swamped,

I'll find so much joy just seeing him, and so would he.

We'll still argue over the smallest thing, and making up would be the bomb.

And at the end of the night, i won't feel like how i feel now.

Like the loneliest girl on earth.

That have had so many, but just couldn't find one.

Wow. An emo post.

Well. I remember saying i'll try my very best not to be affected by boys beginning this year.

I don't know how i get so involve in all these nonsense.

Need a break.

Need to tell myself,

They'll all change at the end of the day.

They all do.

Oh well.

Chocolates are my best friend. They don't tell me i need a diet, and they're always there to stop my tears. =)

Stop, crying for them.

Proud

2010-03-24T04:03:00.001+08:00

Today! As of now! As of don't know since how long ago!

I managed to create a web page using only PAINT!

I'm suppose to do it for my assignment, and the web page does not necessary have to work.

Hence!

My web page does not work.

But!

You've got to give me credits for doing it on my own!

I didn't understand what my friends were telling me, go download template la, go www.website.com la, press this la, use dreamweaver la.

Fuckalulu.

See what Irene did using only Paint.

Proud.

Orgasm.

Super bloody proud.

My website for my company, that sells a new product we invented as a group.

Product's name is Suit Up. It replaces the functions of iron. It smooths the creases on clothes. It's a spray. It heats up via kinetic power, hence it only needs mercury and what not. Light and easy carry. Suitable for traveling people and lazy mothers.

Don't have a picture of it yet. But i do have the picture of the website i created using PAINT!

YAY.

Click on the picture for a view of the entire web page.

Thanks! =)

Gonna die in class later morning.

20th birthday! Old edie. Diu.

2010-03-20T15:22:00.000+08:00

For my 20th birthday. =)

There isn't much pictures. I celebrated it twice ^^

Once with Alex and friends, he bought me dinner. Sweet huh. But all pictures are in his iPhone, maybe will bug him to bluetooth it to me on Monday in class.

The second celebration was with two of my seniors and old housemates. They are as sweet =D Bought me dinner, chocolate cake and spend me karaoke. How could anyone stand my disastrous voice?

I received not much pressies this year though, my favorite was these silver hoop earrings from Winkee and Florence. Both my ex housemate.

Just 5 of us =) With a round chocolate cake that resembles the shape and color of my face.

Making a wish =) God bless mummy and daddy.

Sweet LEH!

Don't be jealous, it's hard to be selfless like me.

Hahaha.

Karaoke in Strawberry Karaoke. Lousy place, 1 spoilt mike only. But the company was lovely =)

THE HARDEST ATTEMPT to be cute.

Why doesn't it ever work on me?

The conclusion of this post is, i bloody need a diet.

Like, really really really badly.

Or i'll end up much much rounder.

Okay!

Dieting officially starts today!

Super ♥ !

2010-03-18T14:30:00.004+08:00

My laptop screen.

Heeeeeeee.

Super super ♥ !

Super super syiok arh!

On a raft made for one

2010-03-15T20:58:00.004+08:00

Here's a shot of vincent at MFM in pyramid. I like their garden fishy something something. Haha. Long time ago adie, but i miss his presence.

I wish i'm back in Subang. =( I really wanna go home.

It's gonna be my birthday soon.

And i'm feeling ultra upset because growing up only means responsibility and no more playing.

Take me somewhere, where gravity is dead.

Boys before/over flowers. Mad love.

2010-03-06T23:17:00.001+08:00

I wanna wanna wanna touch you, you wanna touch me too.

What a horny song. Haha.

I finished watching this show, Boys Before Flowers. Korean edition of Meteor Garden, i reckon it's much much better. And the guys are much much cuter!

Korean F4. SO LENG CHAI!

Taiwan F4. Haha.

I know damn not fair. Lol. Okay okay, compare nicely.

F4 leaders.

1. Taiwan - Dao Ming Shi! Quite handsome also la.

2. Korean - Gu Jun Pyo. Score! Score all! Damn, they look alike.

The players of F4.

1. Taiwan. For some reason i don't like him. Lol.

2. Korean. He wins! He wins!

The supposed cool F4.

1. Taiwan. I love him because of Autumn's Concerto. Another drama. Heee.

2. Korean. Lol. Cute also lehhh.

The emo F4.

1. Taiwan. Cute right. Everybody loves him.

2. Korean. Score all! Pretty boy wins! I don't care!

Overall hor, i liked the Korean edition more. Although i admit when Meteor Garden was out i thought they were the cutest ever. And now, even though i can't understand what a single Korean word (i watched with subtitles of course), i'm in love with them.

LOOOOVEEEE!

Korean boy wins!

I don't care.

My new hair. Black for CNY.

2010-02-05T23:54:00.004+08:00

I dyed my hair black (actually brown la, but it looks damn black) 2 weeks ago. Did i mention?

So many people giving me comments about my new hair colour after i dyed, whether i asked or not. Funny hor.

"Tsk tsk, why did you do it irene? Don't suit you la.."

"Cause i kena denda loh."

"Irene! Why black adie wan! Don't suit you la.."

"Cause i kena denda loh."

"Not nice la Irene, why you dye it black?"

"Cause i kena denda loh"

"Yr, i not use to it la. So ugly."

"Ya meh.. Okay.."

"Why you so free go change?"

"Cause i kena denda loh"

"Okay la, it's not ugly la, just that i'm not use to it la"

"I got ask you meh"

No la, not saying you guys cannot give comment la. I don't mind wan. Cause i like it! Haven't have black hair since... Form 5?

Matriculation. Black and curly. Ugly like aunty. Year 2007.

Black with a tad bit of colour. Better looking la.

After straightening it at KK as a surprise for my previous ex. He liked it super a lot. =) Year 2008, Sept.

After cutting it short. =) Still straight, but face chubby. Lol. Year 2008, Dec.

5 days before my 19th birthday! Half black, half brown. Oh no. But hair all dying already, no shop wanna dye for me. 2009, March.

Not sure when. Hmm. But colour is nice hor.

Dyed it purplish red on May, 2009.

Came back for my semester break, went swimming everyday. Damn clever. Colour came off and became brown again. But from the root la. So not that bad.

Straightened again in Oct, 2009. But don't seem to have any nice picture.

From purplish red. I don't know how.

With the glaring sunlight and a cheapo webcam. But my hair is beginning to shout for attention. Damn not black, and with that hair in this stupid Uni, i know my time is short.

Finally got caught one fine day... And was asked to dye it black, or pay the fine of RM 100.

so here. black coloured hair cina mui.

Damn cina quality picture. Haha.

Oooh. Yeahh, that's just one of the many tax free chocolate and liquor shop in Labuan.

I miss home

2010-01-28T22:32:00.001+08:00

It's the feeling of holding the umbrella under the rain and strolling back to my room after a meeting.

It's the feeling of kneeling down searching for my keys in my bag outside my locked door because the books are too heavy.

It is running your hands on the dirty wall to find the switch when the room is pitch dark.

It is looking at the light hopelessly when it just wouldn't switch on.

It is peeling your own bed sheet for laundry at a laundry shop, paying RM4.00 to the aunty when it's done.

It's that awful worry about what is for dinner every night.

It's that wonder about how many more instant noodles could i still survive on.

It's that crap about forgetting to wash your last pair of clean socks when you wanna wear sneakers to class.

It's the drag of bringing myself to the clinic with bus no.4.

It's the squatting down at the great public water tank while scrubbing my lingerie and formal clothes.

It's the nights you go out without a curfew and you feel awesome till you miss a place to return to when the party is over.

It's the pressure of dividing your money to books, food, leisure and squinting when you see that pair of nice heels.

It is lying down and wondering what are your friends doing, back in the place where people cared.

It is buying your own pad, and actually pausing to consider the price and the pieces before throwing them into your basket.

It is an ultimate hole that cannot be filled, till you step down from the plane and inhale that KL polluted air.

Camera Phone. Mad random.

2010-01-23T01:39:00.001+08:00

Having curry puffs for dinner. Bad idea. Cause it's yucky. Now my lips are sticky and i don't know why.

Anyway. I'm glad for people that comes through for me when i need them. =)

Here are some few pictures from my phone's camera. Totally random, no story sequence and bad picture quality.

Last slice of pizza nobody can finish. Even with The Tabasco.

I must be really happy that time.

Spot the hidden Chipsmore chocolate!

There it is!

What, i already said it's totally random.

My missing N from my keyboard that i found caught in my umbrella.

My Entrepreneurship Project. We made RM 300. Awesome leh!

The lecturer's bungalow from my balcony view.

Big also no use la. No water also what. Hahaha.

The only sister i have in the whole world. Yes la, she's fairer and have bigger eyes la.

Her. =)

The horror. I was screaming till i fainted.

No effect on me. But i know a couple of social smokers that might mind.

Nice not?

I helped made.

Really la okay.

Doing henna in an Arabic counter by classmates.

Not bad eh? Rm 4 nia.

From bus mini no.4's view.

The night where there's no electricity and i have to pass up my homework tomorrow.

Inspiring words taken in the toilet of my church.

The most prettiest roses ever!

From the inside of a mini cooper =)

The glorious Pavilion where people awaits for the fake snow.

Down pour the pretty "snow".

Out ran the people who found out it was soap foam.

Korean cuisine. I love.

Radish Kimchi! THE BOMB.

A spoon. But it's actually chocolate.

Super nice okay. From some funky country.

No. 2 nephew. My heart. Nicholas. Cutest ever.

No. 1 nephew. My heart. Jonathan. Naughtiest ever.

No. 3 monkey. This one looks like his upset cause i'm holding him so tight.

This is better =) This is Ivern baby. He's the loveliest of all.

My Eeyore who sleeps with me every night. So ugly but i so love =)

The best thing about clubs in labuan. Entrance fee, RM 15. The most expensive because it was New Year's Eve. Normal days, RM 5.

Sorry. This is the best. Look at the bloody price for happy hour. And this is in a pub.

Hah.That's all. Thanks for your time.

Leave me alone

2010-01-20T15:27:00.001+08:00

I feel pretty upset today.

Cause everything is going bad, down, horrible. Fuckalulu.

I can't help but to wish to be in someone else' shoes.

People that i thought i could trust and confide in just showed me such a shocking side. Words that i never imagined will come out from their mouth i hear, tears that i never thought would be caused by them i drip.

This whole lecturer thing ain't over yet.

And me being a slut that invited this problem is becoming a major hit.

In the end, i was told i have a personality problem.

I guess i do.

I think i want a brand new life. And say goodbye to all these problems and people that i know. I don't mind starting my degree course fresh from the start. Maybe i could leave and go to a new country, meet new people, have a new roommate or i could stay alone.

I could start studying from scratch. Work my way through studying.

I could look for a job when i graduated.

Awhile later, pay for my own car and rent a better room.

Maybe i'll meet someone. Who never heard of my past and doesn't want to know why i ran away as long as i'm with him.

And then a new life will begin again.

I could then draw till my eyes hurt, play the guitar till my fingers hurt. Take up cooking lessons and make cookies everyday for my family. I could have my own art studio.

I could.

But i couldn't. How sad.

I feel better now at least. Compared to when i typed the first few words and i was crying. Because i've got a dream now. It's impossible to catch though. But at least it doesn't judge me.

I missed church today and i lied to mummy that i went.

2010-01-17T15:41:00.001+08:00

I missed church again this week. Because i was out late last night. Am i really going over the border?

Church should never be missed. That was what i was taught growing up. But then for almost a year in that awful Tangkak small shit town located near the border of Malacca and Johore, i missed it.

Then i came to Uni. In this awful shit island Labuan with no water. And i started going again.

Now, i've found clubbing and karaoke kakis, drinking buddies and fun people that likes to go out on Saturday nights.

Not to mentioned, i'm single and nobody is there to report to. Hah.

Which MEANS! >> No church on Sunday morning. =/

Or i could try to stay awake in church, but then that's just being half hearted.

OH well.

I promise to go next week. I promise i promise i promise.

Thanks you guys. I didn't know you guys read my blog. And that lecturer messaged me again yesterday evening, seems to be annoyed that i didn't reply or pick up his call. Maybe i should get a guy to pick up, so he'll get the hint.

But i so don't wanna fail. =/

Sigh.

Life kindda sucks doesn't it? I'm hungry like mad now.

It's amazing how i can eat so much and still be so hungry.

If only the words were, it's amazing how i can eat so much and still be so thin. Haha.

Have you guys met Ba? He's in Chee Ping's blog. I think he's really cool. Sometimes Ba would scratch his groin. Awesome.

Who are you showmercy? Tze Hsien arh. Should be lerrr.

Homework is depressing.

2010-01-10T23:45:00.000+08:00

*cough cough*

Beh tahan man. Na beh, till now still coughing.

Maybe that's because i went clubbing last night and had too many drinks.

Wooohoooo~

At least i exercised?

Anyway, i'm suppose to choose a current issue in human resource management and present it during tutorial class. Wondering if i'm suppose to present about something boring like recruitment or something a lil bit more spicy like boss and employee sex. What, it's still human resource what. Oh hell yeah it's management.

Last night was the first time i puked after drinking.

High five anyone?

It's bad to have Martell, Bacardi and Tequila down your throat. And even worse to down it all with beer.

I'm going to be sooo fat.

Probably gonna end my life single, broke, saggy boobs and one fat ugly beer belly.

Sigh, well at least the single part sounds not too bad. Unless i meet someone that's my Mr. Right =)

When is that ever going to happen?

Anyway, i'm not sure if i should take JLPT level 3 this year. It's going to be an extra 3 hours every week for the whole year + two mad intensive course weeks during December. Just the reason why i came back late last holiday and spent whole less time with Vincent, Vivian, A ma and others.

But then i was praying just now, and i realized that i knew the answer all along. =)

Sometimes i don't know when i rant on my blog like this do people read. But i know a few that does. And sometimes i wonder why. And i wonder why i bother to read other people's blog too. I guess that concludes that we are all san pat people with nothing better to do online.

Back to trying to do my homework now. Homework. Sigh. The word itself looks depressing like hell.

Cough syrup is delicious

2010-01-09T11:50:00.000+08:00

Are you guys watching Autumn's Concerto (下一站，幸福。) ?

Cause it's sooooo nice. I super like.

I've been so sick these days. With my nose blocked and coughing through the nights. Can die. Went to the doctors two days ago, begging for antibiotics and a non-drowsy cough medicine. The doctor so funny, use the torchlight to shine on my pimple and tell me not to scratch it. Warned me about having a scar later some more.

I've tasted the most delicious cough syrup in my entire life. I'm serious. It's so yummy!

See. I purposely downloaded this image from Google so that i can share this joy with you. I don't mind taking it 1000 times a day. Of course that means i have to be very very sick, so i don't want to.

Anyway!

I really really need my exercise. So when shall be the next time i club? Hmmm.

Oh .. and as of right now at this very moment. My hostel has run out of water... =/

Baby darling Vivian

2010-01-03T15:57:00.000+08:00

Don't really have a newer picture of us. Or a lot of picture of us.

But my heart and my mind has your name and impressions tattooed and drawn all over it.

I love you to death.

Upon seeing those pictures, it almost made me cry.

Because it struck me so hard,

that i could loose you that easily.

And all that we have could be gone like that.

And knowing that you're alive,

makes me wanna pray for you more each day.

You know how much you mean to me baby,

how much we share in common.

It's impossible to find another twin like you,

and i'd give my life for you anytime.

I love you.

Be strong, and take courage.

Joseph Arthur

2009-12-31T11:42:00.000+08:00

I love Joseph Arthur.

This is the link to his poetry blog.

I love him like mad. His songs, his style, his writing, him on the guitar.

He inspires me to draw, to play the guitar, to sing, to be happy. =)

*hugs an imaginary Joseph Arthur*

Please listen to his songs.

Here's one of my favourite. It's call Honey and the Moon.

That excludes you Vivian, since you say i have bad taste in songs. Hmmph.

*******

I went to for a jog yesterday. Was really pleasant, and i kept pushing myself forward. A strange voice in my head telling me that i can do it. I went for a walk at the beach later on too. It was simply pleasant to have the sun shinning on the left side of my face while i did yoga at a secluded area where nobody was watching (i hope).

I bent down, look at the sea, and said goodbye to yoga. I'll be stopping yoga.

Anyway! Back to the run.

*huffff .. pufff.. i can do it i can do it .. huffff... pufff..*

But there's this weird strenght pulling me back, i call it 'The Lazy Aura". Haha, not bad huh. It just keeps slowing me down.

Hmm, or maybe that's just my fats.

Got to stop eating so much.

Wanna be healthy starting this semester. I've got a spanking GPA of 3.93 for my previous semester. I'm mad happy about it and i know that it was really God that helped me.

By the way!

I failed my 2nd 2009 new year resolution, to be 45kg.

Dammit.

It's the fourth time i've flunk this resolution. I feel so lazy now, for the whole year to work out.

HOW CAN I EVEN FEEL LAZY FOR THE WHOLE YEAR AHEAD.

I'm a pig.

It's okay, for the year 2010, i wanna strive to be 45kg!

Not like i'm wishing for something hard like grow taller. Although it's scientifically possible, i'm only 20 next year.

Crap, that's old. No offense. Haha.

I'm a pig that is old and lazy.

Few more resolutions too, that are best only to be shared with closest people i love (that excludes my family cause they can be very judgmental).

I've got a feeling, that it's going to be a great fucking year!

Correction, fucking great year!

Great fucking year is not bad too. *smiles mischievously*

Point of turn

2009-12-23T01:23:00.002+08:00

It's all about love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, self-control.

I just yelled at my mum.

Sigh.

I need a change, and i'm thrilled that i found out how much i need it.

Being caught up with Ryan, Randall and Alex really changed me.

These few days was really awesome. In a way that i hung out with older friends, and they just brought me back to how i use to be. Long before i enter the dreadful UMS.

Even church members in Labuan who actually thinks that i'm not ready for so many things, and i need to come to bible classes more. Not that i'm proud, but not saying anything in the classes doesn't mean that i don't know anything about the bible and i'm a new believer.

Yeap, i've really drifted so far away. From myself, from my old friends, from God, from my family.

This holiday, had taught me so much. So much that i'm missing out in life. Drifting away for 3 years is really hard.

I'm back. =)

Thanks Yoke Aun, for the memories you showered upon me. And how much you reminded me again, over the phone when i'm in Labuan, and even when i'm in Subang, our walks together and smses. Even the time you didn't pick up my call when i was dead bored last Sunday. Thanks la! *snorts at you*

Then there's Danny Szeto, who was just warm and nice and somehow always reachable. Nice symphony and metal combo disc from Metallica that helps so much in this process of search. And the mad adorable kitten name Dusty who simply made my day that you saved from a tyre shop.

And Vincent, who never ceased to make my day no matter what. But he's all the way in Spain now. Lol.

Aaahh.

Enlightment.

Buddha rocks.

Cause he mastered the art of Chilling.

Seriously, this is my point of realization in life. Of who i wanna be.

And what happens next, is how hard am i going to try to achieve that.

Gonna go Opera tomorrow with Vivian, Jee Yeng and some friends. Hope to have a blast!!

Goodnight ^^

Last Dinner for 2nd Year, 1st Semester

2009-12-03T02:56:00.000+08:00

Had dinner in town today, with few friends who are all forced to stay back because of JLPT Level 4. I hope i pass it. It's so tough. Japanese. Bleahh.

Had the pre test today. Can't even score half for the listening part. Die.

Anyway! Last class was today! And the exam is this Sunday in UPM. Hmm, where is that?

That's Nicholas and Daniel. That big bottle of Heineken is only RM5.00. Shared one with Daniel after we finished our chinese herbal tea.

Kim Loong. Amused by Nicholas who had only 1 glass and became a tomato. My phone camera sucks though. Need to start carrying with me real camera.

Aaron and Jin Lee. The practically married couple. They are laughing at Nicholas. Frankly, the whole dinner and way back, Nicholas was the crazy drunk guy.

Yeah. That's Nicholas. I have no single clue what is he talking about in this moment. On his second mug nia...

On the way back, we went to Mac Donald to get ice cream. Nicholas was speaking in Japanese and being really drunk and funny. After we got into the car, we laughed our asses off all the way back. He's not that quiet after all once he has a little booze encouragement. Haha.

He even told us he'd pour kerosene on Mr. Fujishima and burn him. Coming from him, that was something. He's the most quiet guy in class man.

RA RA U LA LA

GA GA U LA LA.

Nice song eh?

I'm coming back later. On the 3rd, as of today, as of later at 10.25am, reaching at 1.00pm or so.

Weee!~

Oh, and just one picture of my glorious Heineken in a Tiger mug. =)

Blub blub.

2009-12-01T01:49:00.003+08:00

Truth is, i don't like how i am now. I wanna be that crazy bubbly Irene everybody knew before my SPM ended. Just so fun to not care about a thing in the world. Ain't it so?

Bubbly bubbly bubbly bubbly bubbly bubbly bubbly.

Say it 10 more times and it doesn't feels like a word anymore.

Bubbly.

Bubbly.

Where did you go? Blub blub blub.

Haha. So ugly.

Never stop loving

2009-11-30T01:06:00.000+08:00

Dear diary,

So unhappy today. It's suppose to be 1 year for me and him tomorrow. =) Suppose.

There's no water today, yesterday, and two days ago. They've cut off the water supply to our room, and left us with the big tank. No lights once it gets dark under my block, and the roads are creepy at night.

I fell down two nights ago coming down from the stairs, cause it was so dark i can't see a thing.

Just now while i was bathing with my roommate at the big tank, we heard guy's laughter. It was weird and creepy, cause no guys are suppose to be in our block area? And i was shampooing in my bra.

I cried myself to sleep last night. And i woke up today feeling like crap, without any distinct memory of snoozing my alarm till i'm almost late. It was weird last night, because i keep thinking about things that makes me happy, like chocolates. And almost fell asleep. Though the pain was really throbbing in me.

Then i got up and pray, and i couldn't stop crying till i sleep. Phew.

What hurts more than the truth, is the realization of it. Realizing, where it just strikes you. And you feel the agony deep within. Why get yourself involve with guys in the very first place, irene? Don't mess with love if you can't take the pain.

Seriously?

Cam whore is fun.

2009-11-25T15:03:00.003+08:00

I learned that if i've got fairer skin, i'd probably be happier. =D

Web cam whoring day.

What i've learned. Not just my own experiences here mind you.

Lesson #1 : Don't do it in public. Oh my goodness. Just don't. Especially if you're alone.

Lesson #2 : Make sure that no one you wanna impress is looking. Like your boyfriend's grandma. Or your boss.

Lesson #3 : Assure yourself that 20 shots and still not one seems nice enough, it's not your fault. Go on with it.

Lesson #4 : It gets tiring after awhile. Rest, brush your hair and start over.

Lesson #5 : Don't turn on the shutter sound when you're doing it in the toilet. It stirs curiosity. Not the nice kind.

Lesson #6 : If you're using your friend's phone, transfer the files to your phone when you're done and delete the ones on his/her phone. What the fuck is wrong with you. I don't want 50 shots of your face in various adjusted angles.

(Unless you're snapping some kinky shots on your bf's phone and you want him to think of you when he *ahem*, go ahead.)

Lesson #7 : If you're snapping private parts of your body for your own pleasure, please keep your phone with you all the time. If you wanna send them out cause you're really proud (hahaha .. right .. ) then don't throw a fit when your mum ask you what's your picture doing on Gutter Uncensored.

Anyway! I took like 30 shots, and i only found a few that i like. Crap, i suck. How did those girls on Facebook manage to have a whole album with 200 self shots pictures?

first favorite!

ouuhh, maths is so hard. someone hold me.

okay, cute probably don't work for me.

i know you wanna ..

And just one slutty one. =D

Not bad hor. Last time i use to take and give up. Take and give up. Since i'm stuck here and i've got nothing to do, i'll take up cam whoring! Yoohooo!

Here's one i took long time ago. Not bad for a start eh?

Yeah. Fuck you.

*nom nom nom* (munches on a dead guy's arm)

No, i don't think i have a problem.

*smiles sweetly with a twinkle in my eye* ;)

No that's not a wink you stupid.

Cheeps!

2009-11-23T17:05:00.001+08:00

Hi, everybody.

Meet Chee Ping. He studies in UK, likes to dream, write poems and artsy fancy stuff. He's studying some really tough subject that i don't like. Probably engineering or something, don't remember. Physics perhaps? Or does it have something to do with the human body.

Honestly, i think he'll be suitable studying psychology.

He motivates people greatly, but sometimes he gets depress himself. He has a blog, and his father reads it. Something i just learned.

Anyway, this reminds me greatly of him. And i picked it up from his blog.

Bet you all like him already. Don't cha? I know i do.

One gruesome moment

2009-11-22T15:55:00.001+08:00

Dear Lord,

They called me spoilt, a bimbo and a big lie,

But X-Files said the truth will set me free,

Or was it the bible, i can't remember.

You said to persevere when people mock,

But you know it's so hard to not give one fuck.

One fuck about him, just one. No?

You know my strength, i appear so strong,

You know my nights, the pain the sting.

I want to pray, but the tears the scorns?

Then devil called me, and oh it worsens.

To play along and lie to win,

To put him down and give him pain.

And yet another night when i sleep,

I wonder why my phone still don't bleep.

Where's the apology, where's the sorry,

Where's the i'm bad, i suck, please don't leave me.

It's never heard of, because he won.

I let him think,

That i don't deserve a thing.

Oh at least i still have the peace,

The clean conscious that lies in me.

You've always bestowed two fucks about me,

Listening, strengthening and walking by me.

And i'm glad about the devil's call i missed,

This nightmare this pain is not to be missed.

Amen.

Dove shampoo

2009-11-22T01:45:00.000+08:00

Yawn ..

Went to the English church service today, Saturday night, 1930. Prefer it over the usual Sunday dawn service, at 0730. Because i have to get up at 0600. It's almost ungodly. Yes it's still dawn to me at 0730. What's YOUR problem instead. Go get a life.

Last night, there's no current. When i'm sleeping.

So motherfucking hot. I got up in a blur and fumbled with the power box thingy. No luck.

Went back to sleep. Because i have to get up in a few hours for Japanese.

Slept during Japanese, friend name Fei kept trying to wake me up. But to no avail. It's 4 bloody hours. Poke la, pinch la, slap la. 20 seconds later i'm down again.

This Japanese is killing me, first by swallowing my extra 2 weeks of civilization in Subang, next by digesting my morning sleep. You know the awesome feeling just to snooze?

Oh. I just bought Dove shampoo. Nice.

Arts, ruined.

2009-11-13T21:22:00.000+08:00

What pisses me more than anything about my University is their lack of appreciation for art. I felt so dumbfounded today when i flipped through the monthly subscription of National Geography magazines in my library today. These librarians are obviously too blinded by the guidelines of their religion that they acted in such a crude, unsophisticated manner. Your religion, doesn't and shouldn't affect the non followers in any way. If this is too much for your viewings, then you should probably just label it as untouchable for your kind.

You lame assholes. These are arts. And you paid to subscribe it. And National Geography paid to include these rare photos in their magazines, for your knowledge, for your viewing. Not for a wank off moment if that is what you think of every time you see a pair of boobs.

So much so that you have to use black marker pens to ruin such rare photos and arts.

And the fact that female artists who wants to perform in Malaysia are better off performing with t-shirt and black pants.

It's so obvious who are the ones who need help. And who are the ones seeding curiosity in their offspring. Still don't know where will over loaded curiosity get you eh?

Oh. I love sausages. So unhealthy, but nice. Like when they deep fry it? Yum.

One and only

2009-11-10T23:24:00.000+08:00

Momoput!

Happy birthday!

I've got no picture of us together, probably because we're so vain that every single time we manage to capture a shot together, it's either you're too ugly, or i look fat, or the angle's not right or i'm caught holding a stick.

Nevertheless.

I love you just so much. For being there, in Australia.

I mean.

For being there when i need you, and constantly reminding me that i don't need a man. And that there is no point being upset over them and their stupid behavior. And all that crap about man. And helping me think of ways to lie to my mum. And telling me i'm hot even though i know i'm not.

And just being a nicest friend ever.

Known you since i'm Form 1. And there was a strong love and hate feeling i have towards you. Mostly hate.

What.

We hated each other. And i still remember vividly, that you told me to roll my big boobs off when it was time to go home.

Remember remember?

Now that i think of it, that don't even make sense.

I'm glad that you've found billy, and that you're doing well and happy there.

Pretty upset that you don't stay near me anymore, but on the bright side once you learn how to drive you can drive me around.

*hugs*

Once more, happy birthday. Be a good girl, and pray every night. As i always do for you. =)

Interesting - Of cultural borrowing

2009-11-10T03:29:00.000+08:00

Just some crap i'm learning. Kindda like this paragraph.

Consider, for example, American (U.S.) culture and a typical U.S. citizen, who begins breakfast with an orange from the eastern Mediterranean, a cantaloupe from Persia, or perhaps a piece of African watermelon. After the fruits and her first coffee, she goes on to waffles, cakes made by a Scandinavian technique from wheat domesticated in Asia Minor. Over these she pours maple syrup, invented by the Indians of the eastern U.S. woodlands. As a side dish, she may have the eggs of a species of bird domesticated in Indochina or thin strips of the flesh of an animal domesticated in eastern Asia that has been salted and smoked by a process developed in northern Europe. While eating, she reads the news of the day, imprinted in characters invented by the ancient Semites upon a material invented in china by a process also invented in China. As she absorbs the accounts of foreign troubles, she will, if she is a good conservative citizen, thank a Hebrew deity in an Indo-European language that she is 100 percent American.

Don't elope with the time. There ain't enough time to be eloped.

2009-11-07T02:28:00.003+08:00

I still have many more to go. In terms of exam i mean.

International Marketing. Just found out from my seniors that my lecturer's tips are those that are not coming out in the finals. Great.

Consumer Behaviour. 7 chapters of pure theory and shit.

Business Communication. Guide to writing email, resumes, memos, reports. 4 chapters nia. But if don't study still will die, right.

Japanese. Elope. What's elope you say? Elope means fuck.

Science and Quantitative. Should be able to procrastinate.

Business Statistics. *pulls hair* Chapter 5 to 12. I hate this so much.

Entrepreneurship. Done and over. I hate the lecturer. Ms. Raihana. So wannabe Rihanna. Okay, i'm bummed. I just don't like her. Not even one single tiny bit. I think she should just stay at home and rot instead of spread knowledge. What kind of shit knowledge can you get from a lecturer who doesn't use spell check for her slides and talks constantly about how great she is. Bull. Elope off.

I just post in facebook my view of no.1 rule to studying.

Now, let the last minute late night restless crash course study mad procrastination effect whole shebang began.

All the suay, go away.

Hehe. It rhymes.

Last piece of advice,

Don't elope with the time. There ain't enough time to be eloped.

Heineken

2009-11-03T23:21:00.000+08:00

Good thing about Labuan is, I'm having a can of cold beer as i'm studying my business stat.

Want some?

Not bad eh?

Words are lie, love is pain, cheat is fun and we are gone

2009-11-03T14:06:00.000+08:00

Do you know anyone who's cheating? Because i do. I know a lot in fact, but i don't spill. Or when that someone is flirting outrageously, i don't spill. Is that the reason why it is happening to me? That nobody tells me about the many flings that he have =)

Sure i flirt, sure i do much worse thing. But i conceal it nicely so you won't get hurt. Or when people sees it, they don't pity you.

It's funny how the world changes, how did you change, how did i change. What has become of us, or the guy i use to know. The girl you used to know. The love we thought we had.

I guess words are lies, love is pain, cheat is fun and we are gone.

p/s: i'm not saying i'm right. I'm a flirt too. But spare me some, because i don't boast about it.

Vincent Chua Wen Sherng

2009-11-01T16:52:00.000+08:00

Dear Vince,

Be strong, and happy.

Love,

I know i look shit ugly. But we were both high. Haha.

Life is like a box of chocolates

2009-10-26T02:02:00.000+08:00

Cheeps says it isn't. Wei Jie doesn't think so too. I think it is, partially. For me, it's like many many boxes of chocolates.

Sometimes it's pleasant and nice. Like Ferrero Rocher.
You know, like when someone random praises you randomly. Or that peck on your cheek by your boyfriend for no reason. Or when you get pleasing results. Or when you done your assignments. Or when you're on your bed. Or when you have a good hair day. Or finding out your craps are delicious.

like could be like a nice box of chocolates

Sometimes astonishingly nice, like Bounty.
Like unexpected results, like unexpected gifts. Like when you expected your lecturer to pile you with assignments and she turned out to have diarrhea on that day of class. Like when you flipped the pretty heels over and find out it's on 70% sale and your size is available and new. Like finding a parking right in front of the entrance of Center Court in Mid Valley. Like spotting a broadband lying ever so lonely on your brother's table and he's not around. *weeee*

hope everybody missed this.

Sometimes orgasmic. Like Sex.
Like sex. What. DIY is a form of sex too. Oh come on, don't deny it.

mmh. orgasmic.

Sometimes too damn sweet, like Cadbury or Nestle's milky chocolates.
End up you get sick of it, or loss your appetite for dinner. Like guys that make so many sweet promises. Yes, i know you can tell by now i've had my heart broken many times. Like the amount of durian you swallow and get ulcers under your tongue the next morning. Like smoking ultra happily then saw your aunt staring at you and you start worrying if she'll tell your mum. In this case, after feeling sucks hell a lot.

Sometimes depressing, like made in Malaysia Nips.
Mmh. That's just total disappointment. Like a horrible blind date. Ugly presents. Giving birth and realizing the supposed father is not the father. Haha. Like when You tube is lagging. Like overcooked beef. Like the end of a nice book. Like a shop that decides to take a day off on the day you happily skipped there for something. Or like that cheaper item on the menu that makes you regret. Or like a friend that never changes his attitude and continues to talk about you no matter what.

Sometimes overrated, again like Ferrero Rocher.
Enough said.

Okay. Sex is not a chocolate. Not that i know of anyway.

And sometimes, life just seems wrong. Like this that i saw in the Labuan jetty.

Anyone wants a box of hot chili chocolates as a symbol for their life?

Money can help you have a great time looking for happiness =)

2009-10-22T22:58:00.002+08:00

I have two mid-terms tomorrow!

2030 - 2130 Entrepreneurship
2200 - 2330 Consumer Behaviour

Mad. But should be okay to handle. I hope. Heh.

But i'm coming back this Saturday, 24th! YippeE! One week worth of relaxation, yoga without limits, jogs in my neighborhood, play time in the park with my nephews and definitely the people i will be meeting that is making me soooo excited!

But i have to bring back one assignment. Dammit. And notes to study. Double damnation.

Ooh. Saw this in the newspaper the other day. Definitely agree with it.

Went to the library to study today. Managed only 1 chapter and a half. Spent the rest of the time fooling around. But all in all, i think studying works only when you're least stressed up. My results in Matrics was shit i know, but coming here and learning to loosen up a lil' and having tons of faith helped like mad. Also, last minute revision seems to work. Haha.

By the way. Does anybody paint their toenails and fingernails in the exact same colour?

Previous posts deleted. =)

2009-10-22T03:52:00.002+08:00

Because i want something new, probably a change. In this blog, or perhaps in me. Hmm.

Anyway. This is how my laptop screen looks now. I like. ♥

Had a bottle of Corona few nights ago when going out with friends for dinner. It's cheaper than the mango shake behind it. This is Labuan, alcohols are cheap. Picture ain't awesome, but the night almost was.